volvata: when you had an appointment and got to leave during the middle of school it was always so fucking triumphant like “haha bye you dumb sons a bitches, i’m gonna go get my teeth cleaned and then eat mcdonalds. where you at”
Pixar animator sketches the NFL playoffs
iheartchaos: Through the NFL playoffs, Pixar animator Austin Madison sketched the results of each of the match-ups by drawing each team’s mascots battling it out. Above, behold broncos getting destroyed by an Atlanta Millenium Falcon. Read More
Me with romantic interest: Hi, how've you been lately? How's that project you're working on? Yeah? I'd love to see sometime, dude! How's the family? Good, good. Well, I'll talk to you later! Yeah we definitely need to hang out more often. Hopefully see you soon! :)
Me with platonic friend: YOU GORGEOUS CREATURE HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN SINCE LAST I SAW YOU? HOW I'VE MISSED YOUR LUCID DIAMOND EYES, UGH I JUST WANT TO KISS YOU AND MAKE SWEET, SWEET LOVE UNDER THE MOONLIGHT. WHY ARE YOU SO PERFECTLY SCULPTED, ARE YOU AN ANGEL MADE OF MARBLE LET'S GET MARRIED.
“women are weaklings!” i’m strong enough to carry your corpse to the woods
There’s a loneliness that only exists in one’s mind. The loneliest moment in...– F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (via 13neighbors)
humansolatium: morningwine: are those pants made by karl marx? because dat ass is causing an uprising in my lower class. omfg
me in my head: i'm going to get my life together and read classic novels and drink green tea and eat really healthy and wear cute outfits and make interesting artwork and spend lots of time outside. i'm going to start biking everywhere and walking and listening to lots of new indie bands that i've always wanted to listen to and take bubble baths and my life is just going to be amazing.
me in reality: well. today i think i'm going to watch netflix in my pjs and eat ice cream. and if i'm feeling really productive i might shower.
In pop culture, girls who crush hopelessly on guys they can’t have are painted...– Lamenting the Friendzone, or: The Nice Guy Approach to Perpetuating Sexist Bullshit (via expensivebirdcage)